What Would Coco Do?

"How many cares one loses when one decides not to be something but to be someone." Coco Chanel

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Location: Nashville, Tennessee, United States

I love the finer things in life, and I love writing. That's why I'm here. Want Coco to review your product? E-mail me at cococares@gmail.com!

Tuesday, May 08, 2007

Fear the Fish - Love the Lard

Great. Dear Brittney over at Nashville is Talking has informed us, via the AP, that "U.S. health officials have learned farmed fish were fed meal contaminated by an industrial chemical linked to pet food recall."

I do my level best to make healty meals in my house. I mostly use olive oil when fat is needed, and beef is rarely found in my refrigerator. I serve a ton of fish, usually in the form of salmon, sea bass or tilapia.

Not long ago, the fresh spinach scare made me ditch that frequent menu item, then green onions, and most recently peanut butter got trashed.

Then the food scare threatened two precious members of my family, Inky and Scooter. I looked at every updated list, and thankfully the brand that they prefer was never on the recall list. Don't mess with my kitties' chow.

So this is what Coco recommends:

Love the lard people - embrace it with two greasy hands. It has worked for centuries for all sorts of people, who are we to say that it is any worse for us now that we're gonna die from contaminated healthy food?

Avoid fiber at all costs. Remember, those poor fish were fed contaminated meal of some sort. That sounds like fiber to me. Pppffftttt who really likes to eat oak bark pellets served with soy milk anyway. Eat your froot loops and pour whole milk over it like a good American.

Leafy greens are just dangerous, especially in raw form. Um hello spinach scare? If you must eat anything green, be sure it is fried to death or swimming in hot cheeze and/or cream.

Drink copious amount of whiskey. Enough of that gasoline in your gullet will kill any cootie that might be present in your system. Whenever I feel malaise, my bossman tells me it is because I don't drink enough. He is so wise.

If you don't smoke take it up post haste. Besides our atmosphere being filled with all that oxygen, I'm sure there is airborne pestilence thrown in there for good measure. Smoke those beasties out of your lungs.

Gosh, I can't think of any more wisdom to impart right now. I care about my dear readers so much.....really I do.

2 Comments:

Blogger Biby Cletus said...

Nice post, its a really cool blog that you have here, keep up the good work, will be back.

Warm Regards

Biby Cletus - Blog

12:19 AM  
Anonymous Ms. Tabitha said...

MmmMMmMM lard.... I for one never let the skin from my fried chicken go to waste.

That's really scary about the fish though...

9:03 AM  

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